Frosting

So, listen...I'm about to let you all in on something that is really a fundamental part of what makes me "me".

I like sleep.

Actually, to be honest, I like it a lot more than "like".  I love it.  I relish a good night's sleep and protect it with the carnivorous ferocity of a jungle cat and her fresh kill.  I love it so much that one year for Christmas, Circus Dad gave me one of those coupon presents (seriously!!) for one full month of not having to wake up with our children.  Best present he ever gave me.  But don't tell him that because I kind of like the Cartier watch, too...and I don't want him to get the idea that coupons are a legit way for him to express his undying love.

Anyway.  Sleep.  I was blessed with one child who is a great sleeper.  She slept through the night early and happily took her naps and goes to bed every night without difficulty.  I suspect it might have something to do with her having figured out that she gets to Star in her own nightly performances in her dreams.  I also think that she's got a lot of her mama in her and I really like to sleep.   Drama and I get along just fine at bedtime and I completely understand her reluctance to drag out of bed at 6:15am to get ready for school.  In fact, I'm right there with her in misery.

Unfortunately, my second child does not seem to need as much sleep as the average bear.  She was slow and resistant to the idea of Sleeping Through The Night.  In fact, she would still prefer to get up and play with something than waste those hours lying in bed.  Every day, we go through hostage-style negotiations over whether or not she has to take a nap.   And she generally requires at least 30 minutes to sing, shout, play, request a glass of water, get up to tinkle, require another kiss, and restart her "night night" music before she finally drops off to dreamland.  I suspect is might have something to do with her having figured out that if she is sleeping, she is not getting into something.  She also has an internal alarm clock. It is perpetually set for 5:30am.  Every time we do a big time-zone change I harbor fantasies that I will be able to "reset" her clock to a later wake-up time.  Ha!  That kid's clock is impenetrable.

Those of you that know me well know that I have an entire shelf in my library devoted to Sleep Books.  I've got Babywise; Heathy Sleep Habits, Happy Child; Happiest Toddler on the Block; The Baby Whisperer, and on and on.  I've tried every trick in them.  Twice.  I've currently resorted to all-out bribery in order to keep Trouble in her bed, and deter her from waking up the entire house at 5:30am.  I'm sure some of you are scratching your heads and thinking, "5:30 isn't that much earlier than 6:15...just let her play quietly or something".  Yes.  I agree.  Every night before bedtime Trouble gets to put stickers on her Chore Chart.  She loves the stickers...but she really loves to go pick out garbage trinkets from the Stanley Market.  And if she gets three days in a row of stickers for Not Waking Up Mama and Not Waking Up Sister and Staying Quiet in the Morning, she gets a prize.  Want to know how many prizes she's garnered?  None.  Once she made it two days in a row.  She was sick.

Last weekend I spent the night in the school library with Drama and her Daisy Scout Troop.  Circus Dad spent the night at home with Trouble.  In case you were wondering, she had pizza for dinner, ice cream for dessert, stayed up late watching a movie, and did not have to take a bath...and there is rumor (though yet unproven) that she may have brushed her teeth with frosting.  She slept until 7am.  Of course she did.  Because Circus Dad was in charge.

Circus Dad is on a business trip at the moment....so I can't really count on him for help.  When Trouble completed her Chore Chart last night, she was dejected that she had NO stickers and promised that she was not going to wake anybody in the morning.  I actually believe that she meant it.  But when her alarm went off at 5:30am, she was so excited that she couldn't contain herself.   And she lovingly woke up the house with a chorus of "Mmmmoooooommmmmaaaayyyyyyyyy!"s.

The chore chart isn't working.  But Circus Dad's methods seemed to have some impact...so I'm going rogue.  Not Sarah Palin-style....I'd look ridiculous in camouflage and even though I *can* see China from my house I'm not saying it gives me Foreign Policy experience.  Whoops.  I digress.  It's because I have not gotten to sleep past  5:30am since the Christmas I got that dang coupon.

My Plan?  Frosting.  I'm leaving a bowl of it on the kitchen table before I go to bed and telling Trouble that she can eat it all if she lets the rest of us sleep in peace until 6:15am.  Don't Judge.  I'll brush her teeth with real toothpaste after.